I’m often asked, “What exactly is it that you do?” By this, I assume people are wondering what it is I can help them with.
This is an easy question to answer because it’s about what I want for my clients. How I want you to feel.
What I want for my clients is the same as what I want for myself. I want to feel good about myself, my relationships, life and career. I want to know what my values are, my purpose. I want to have faith that I’m doing what I want and what will make me feel happy.
So, as a coach, my intention is to create the space for clients to think, explore and understand themselves better. To help you recognise and express what’s important to you, to create a vision. Then it’s about the support and ‘holding’ as you experiment, take small actions and transition toward a more content, fulfilling and satisfying career and life.
I know what it feels like for me when life gets overwhelming or I feel stuck. No decision seems right and there’s a sense of feeling like a failure because ‘the right path’ is not evident.
I also know what it feels like when I feel angry and resentful because I’m ‘people pleasing’ doing things because I ‘should’ rather than because I want to.
Being in jobs and careers that feel dead-end, unfulfilling, demotivating, ‘not me’, where I worry I haven’t got a clue what I’m doing, where I force myself to go to work even though I hate it. I’ve certainly had these feelings and experiences.
Coaching then is about creating a space and environment where you feel comfortable to talk freely about almost anything that you want to. I say almost anything because there are boundaries, areas where I’m not equipped to serve you. However, stress, lack of confidence, uncertainty about career, constant fear, anxiety and procrastination, are issues which you might be wanting to deal with.
Underlying some of these may be existential concerns around the meaning of your life, the temporary nature of all aspects of life, your desire for autonomy and independence and the seemingly contrary need to have close nurturing relationships and bonds with others, wanting control and certainty and yet knowing that we cannot have either.
As we work together, I will ask questions, make observations, offer suggestions. I may challenge you too. I’m not the sort of coach that only listens.
However, I won’t give you advice or tell you what to do. Rather I will encourage you to have courage and faith in yourself to do what’s right for you.
In conclusion, personal development coaching with me is about helping you become more purposive and content. It’s not about making you happy at all times. This is not possible. What is possible, however, is to understand yourself and what motivates you, and act on this. It’s also possible to understand your triggers and sensitivities better, and know what to do, when your buttons are pushed.
