When I was involved in recruitment, I remember someone saying, “When I’m asked about weaknesses at a job interview, I say I’m a bit of a perfectionist. It’s a win:win. I offer a weakness that isn’t really a weakness.”
They are not alone in thinking that perfectionism is a quality that employers prize. It can bring high standards, quality, thoroughness, reliability, strong follow-through and a drive for improvement. Perfectionists can push themselves and their teams to raise the bar.
When Perfectionism Starts to Sabotage Success
Striving for perfection can be crippling. I’ve worked with clients who barely allow themselves to sleep because it takes so much time to meet their own exacting standards. Perfectionists may procrastinate, delay until everything feels “just right,” or say yes to everything for fear that setting limits looks like weakness. They often struggle to delegate, believing others won’t do things ‘properly’. Their constant nit-picking and impossible deadlines can be tough for their teams.
Perfectionism often goes hand-in-hand with low self-belief and imposter feelings. For self-employed practitioners like myself, it can show up in under-pricing, doubting our value and over-delivering.
Perfectionism can become a lonely and exhausting way to live.
Perfectionist tendencies can harm wellbeing, damage relationships and scupper career opportunities. I can still remember being held back in my career because I was exhausted trying to do everything ‘perfectly’. Being focussed on perfectionism can contribute to being defensive and can get in the way of making and learning from mistakes.
What causes perfectionism (and who’s most at risk?)
Perfectionism often takes root in early experiences — being praised for achievement, learning that mistakes weren’t acceptable and fear of criticism. High achievers, people in highly competitive or high-stakes roles, and individuals from underrepresented groups can be especially vulnerable, believing they must constantly prove their value.
The workplace experience can also encourage perfectionist tendencies.
The Unspoken Expectation of Perfection at Work
Although few organisations would openly admit to expecting perfection, many workplace cultures quietly encourage it.
You may recognise some of these signs:
Being “always on” – feeling the need to respond to emails, messages, or requests almost 24/7.
Fear of getting it wrong – worrying that one mistake or careless social media post could damage your reputation or even cost you your job, especially in competitive industries.
Constant measurement – performance metrics, appraisals, and digital dashboards make you feel as if you’re under continuous scrutiny.
Leadership modelling – when managers set unrealistic standards or glorify overwork, others follow suit to keep up.
Blurred boundaries – remote and hybrid work make it harder to “switch off,” reinforcing the idea that true commitment means constant productivity.
These subtle signals create a culture where striving for perfection feels less like a choice and more like a condition for survival — one that ultimately fuels stress, burnout, and disengagement.
How Do You Know if You’re a Perfectionist? 9 Common Signs
- Regularly running late because you try to fit too much into too little time.
- Checking and rechecking work, focusing on every small detail to make sure everything is covered
- Equating success with hard work, discipline, and achievement — “work first, play later” (or never).
- Setting impossibly high expectations (without even realising it) and feeling deflated when you don’t meet them.
- Getting upset or berating yourself over small errors, forgetfulness, or missed details.
- Lashing out at yourself — or others — when things don’t go to plan.
- Having a strong need to be in control.
- Procrastinating because your ‘to do’ list is overwhelming.
- Struggling to finish (or even start) things because there’s always one more thing that needs doing.
If some of these feel familiar, the good news is that perfectionism is usually learned and can be unlearned.
What to Do If You Have Perfectionist Tendencies
First and foremost, recognising and acknowledging your perfectionist behaviours is crucial — without awareness, you can’t begin to change them.
Next, reflect. When and where do your perfectionist tendencies arise most strongly? Are they consistent across all areas of your life, or do they appear mainly at work, at home, or around certain people?
Then, pick one specific behaviour or situation where perfectionism isn’t serving you, and make a small, manageable change. For instance, if you tend to stay up late perfecting work, cut back by just ten minutes. If you normally work until 11:30 p.m., aim to stop at 11:20. Once that becomes normal, reduce it again. Over time, these small changes build flexibility and self-trust.
Experiment with “good enough.” Ask yourself what the minimum acceptable or “pass” standard might be for a given task. Consider the trade-off between endless refinement and the relief of completion. Often, done really is better than perfect.
Finally, explore who sits on your “perfectionist committee.” These are the inner voices or influences that drive your high standards — people whose opinions or expectations you’ve internalised. Parents, teachers, bosses, partners, colleagues, friends, or even public figures and influencers whose approval you crave or whose standards you emulate.
Then reflect or journal on…
- Who is on your committee?
- Who is in charge?
- How does each member perceive you?
- Do they all agree on their assessments?
- Who holds back your progress — and who encourages it?
- Who gets heard the most, and who not at all?
- How nurturing is this committee for your wellbeing and growth?
- Is there anyone you’d like to remove — or perhaps add?
Simply identifying these influences can be a powerful step toward reclaiming autonomy and softening perfectionism’s hold on your life.
Final Thoughts
Perfectionism can feel like a strength — the thing that sets you apart — but over time it can quietly erode confidence, wellbeing, and joy in your work. Loosening its hold isn’t about letting standards slip; it’s about giving yourself permission to be human, to learn, and to grow. Real fulfilment comes not from doing everything perfectly, but from doing what matters with clarity and self-compassion.
If perfectionism is holding you back in your career or life, you don’t have to tackle it alone. As a Career and Professional Development Coach, I help clients find healthier ways to achieve excellence without burning out. Get in touch if you’d like to explore how to work smarter, not harder — and rediscover a sense of fulfilment along the way.
